I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize
