I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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