Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
i think my cat just said my name.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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