what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
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