You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
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I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
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As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.