Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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