she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
