Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
