What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
