She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
