There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize