it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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