so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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