i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
