i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
