call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You need a sexual gate keeper
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
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