this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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