And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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