Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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