It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
