I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
