i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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