Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
