uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
