You just made me feel so damn special
I'm really into asian looking animals
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
