You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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