Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
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