Your mouth is God's brothel.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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