He is an equal opportunity slut.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
