He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize