We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
