real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
