There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.