Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize