You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
