why didn't you poke me back
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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