I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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