turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
