Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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