You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
