You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
