meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
