what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
