He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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