somebody snuck up and got me drunk
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
