escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
