i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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