drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
