Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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