counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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