I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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