i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize